Miracles Never Cease!

Monday night was a night I will forever remember, for many different reasons. It was a night filled with every emotion, from utter despair to elation. It was a night where the Lord truly showed His hand and power in the work, and when my patience was tried.    

 ​It started out really, really rough. ​We decided to tract in an area we'd never been in before, and knocked two entire streets. Neither of them were friendly. We were rejected at each and every door, and not very nicely, either. As the last door closed, I broke down, right there on the woman's doorstep. Sister Neahusan just wrapped me in a hug and tried to calm me down, but I was really discouraged. You'd think it would have been the other way around, given that she's just barely finished her training and I'm close to going home, but I guess even 'seasoned' missionaries feel the sting and pain of rejection. The hardest thing about it is how much love you feel for these people and how much you want to give them such an incredible gift, and they don't even consider it.   

Hermana Garner's grandma
 and cousins got to attend the concert

  So we got back in the car to go somewhere else, and said a prayer to ask for guidance. I asked Sister Neahusan where to go, because I personally didn't feel like I was very in tune with the spirit at that moment, I was just wishing for the night to end as soon as possible so I could just lay down in bed. She responded, "No, I really think tonight is your night, and I feel a miracle coming on."     I tried not to laugh at her. I'd just broke down, I wasn't feeling any spiritual direction whatsoever - in fact, I was at a point at that moment where I just didn't want to be a missionary. Of course, I didn't discount the idea of a miracle happening, because I know that God is a God of miracles, but I was sure that He wouldn't be able to use me as a tool that night, because I did not feel spiritually in tune or capable in any way of being an instrument in His hands.  

But I started driving, heading out towards the main road, just wanting to get out of that neighborhood. As we drove, we passed an unlit street, and I had the thought to turn down it. Not trusting myself, I kept driving - until the spirit very quickly and clearly said, "Turn around."     I did, still not really trusting that it was the spirit and thinking that I was just making things up myself, and did a u-turn to go back to the unlit street. There were only four houses on it. We drove past the first two, which were completely dark, and then the third, which had a lot of cars there and obviously had some sort of party or gathering going on. So I stopped in front of the fourth house, which had one light on inside from what we could tell.      

Family friends, Anna and Julien Williams
spent some time
 with Hermana Garner this week
and were attended the concert

We said a prayer, then when we stepped out of the car saw a man standing outside. He looked up at us, and Sister Neahusan called out, "Hello!" He didn't respond, staring at us, and I, on a whim (since we couldn't see him at all) said, "Habla espanol?"     "Si."     We were both a little shocked that we'd pulled right up to the house of someone who spoke Spanish and was standing outside - and that he then accepted a copy of the Book of Mormon and a return appointment. It was such an incredible miracle, and I felt the Lord saying to me, "See? They are out there, trust me, I'll lead you to them."   

   We had a number of miracles like that this week, and found four new investigators! Still working on getting the investigators that we have to progress, but we've been finding a lot more people, which has been a blessing. I hope that a bunch of them came to the concert, it was hard to tell because there were so many people and a lot left right when it was over.  

It was a little tough being both a missionary and directing a concert this week. I tried to just not worry

too much about the concert.  It's hard not to wish I could really put my all into it and polish it, but in the end that's not what it's about and I always knew that. So I didn't spend that much time on it, it ended up being a bit thrown together yesterday with sound and bringing in risers and things, but the spirit was strong and the small groups did a great job and it was a full crowd! One of our members told us she brought TEN nonmembers, which is just amazing! 

Love,

Hermana Garner

(We got several reports from family and friend about how wonderful the Christmas concert was, they said the spirit was strong and Hermana Garner sang beautifully!)

Whirlwind Weekend

I LOVE working with Sister Neahusan! We hit the ground running right from the get-go and have seen so many miracles. Honestly, this past weekend felt like an entire transfer, but I know the rest of the transfer is going to go by so fast! 

 We've been able to get back in with an old investigator - I saw him twice this week, once with Sister Fuimaono and once with Sister Neahusan. A lot of things in his life are turning around and he's started reading the scriptures we send him daily. 

  We also saw another investigator twice.  She's been praying about a date and chose December 28th. We're praying that will go through

 We saw some other investigators that we hadn't seen for quite a while, and we were finally able to stop by after transfers. As we were planning what to do, Sister Neahusan was intent on giving them another baptismal date. I was much more hesitant - I didn't know if it would be the best thing for them, and I was sure it would be too pushy. We agreed to consider both sides and pray more about it later that day.   That same day we had the New Missionary Meeting (since Sister Neahusan just finished her training) and in one of the training sessions, we were roleplaying with another companionship. We decided to pretend to be these investigators, and at the end of the role play the other sisters invited us to be baptized on December 23th.   The moment they extended that date, I felt the spirit rush over me. As much as I didn't want to extend a date to them, worried about how they would react, the spirit seemed to be saying in that moment that that was what we needed to do. Hermana Neahusan felt the same, but we prayed to confirm the feeling before entering their house - and again felt the spirit confirm that yes, we were supposed to invite them to be baptized on that date.  I was terrified. I care so much about them and want the best for them, and I didn't know how they would respond to another date so soon, especially when we hadn't seen them in a while. But we followed the spirit, and at the end of our lesson with them we asked them to pray about being baptized on December 23rd. They said they would, and in the closing prayer, prayed right then in front of us to know if that was what the Lord wanted for them.  It was a huge testament to me of the power of the spirit, and that the Lord knows His children so much better than we do. It's why as missionaries we simply cannot rely on our own knowledge and abilities - we HAVE to turn to the Lord and rely on Him, because He knows so much better than we do.  

We were also able to have some great interactions with Gloria and her daughter this week. Her

daughter has a LOT of questions, but she said she'll think about baptism and pray about a date. She came to the Christmas party and got a doll from Santa, she was so excited! It was adorable! And then, yesterday at church, she absolutely loved it, she looked completely comfortable and was glad that they were going to a Spanish ward. Gloria was so happy to see her so happy!  She loves nativities like I do, so I told her she can come with me today to pick out the nativity I'm getting as my Christmas present.

Ezekiel 2:6-7 felt really personal to me as I read it Sunday morning. ..........  

6 ¶ And thou, son of man, be not afraid of them, neither be afraid of their words, though briers and thorns be with thee, and thou dost dwell among scorpions: be not afraid of their words, nor be dismayed at their looks, though they be a rebellious house.  

7 And thou shalt speak my words unto them, whether they will hear, or whether they will forbear: for they aremost rebellious.  

What first caught my attention was the mention of dwelling among scorpions, since that's been very true of my mission :P But applying the rest of the scripture to myself, it made me think of the nature of the calling that I have - that it doesn't matter if I'm accepted or not, my calling is to declare the word, and to do so without discouragement. Sometimes that's hard for me to remember, I want everyone who opens the door to just accept the gospel, but that's simply not the way it is. But that doesn't change my calling and responsibility as a missionary, and I can trust in the Lord, despite the scorpions that surround me :P

Also, in studying Sister Eubank's talk from the General Women's Session of conference, I was really struck by her admonition to be articulate in expressing why we believe what we believe. I decided to write down her questions.  

1. How do you feel about Jesus Christ? 

 2. Why do you stay in the Church? 

 3. Why do you believe the Book of Mormon is scripture? 

 4. Where do you get your peace?   

5. Why does it matter that the prophet has something to say in 2017? 

 6. How do you know he is a real prophet? 

We learned how to make pupusas!!
This is the first one I made, it was good!
I love, love, love pupusas!

 I'm still working on articulating my exact thoughts on each of these in my study journal, but I invite each of you to ponder the same thing. Expressing our faith and testifying to all those around us is how we're going to change the world!  

Love you!! <3

Hermana Garner 

This was the mini stocking I got from one of the couple missionaries, and it reminded me so much of our stockings that I got a little emotional to be honest haha

New Companion

I read a quote in the December Ensign that really stood out to me from the Portraits of Faith series (page 75). This woman said:   "Truth is truth, regardless. You don't have to argue it. You don't have to prove it. It just is. It's real; and it's real for everyone."  So many people think truth is relative, but we know it's not. I'm grateful for that understanding.  

 I also received new insight from Jeremiah 31:35. It mentions "the ordinances of the moon," and I was confused, so I looked at the footnote. With 'ordinance' there, the footnote says, "OR established courses." When explaining ordinances to people on the mission, I've always said that it's the steps we need to take to achieve exaltation. But in reading this explanation of the word - 'established courses' - I was struck by how Christ established the way and course for us. Of course, this was something I already knew, but it helped me understand and have more of an appreciation for the word itself and what it really means - each of them is part of the Lord's established course for us.

It was a bit of a slow week for a few different reasons.  I'll miss Sister Fuimaono (she's getting transferred) I'm looking forward to getting to know my new companion and new transfer! 

 But we saw some HUGE miracles this week!! The first was with a sweet couple that I met OVER A YEAR AGO with Sister Cedeno, and I've ended up serving with them in my area for the majority of my mission (they're right on the border of the branch and the ward). I've been trying to get in with them for that whole time, because the few times that I did catch them they always made appointments and were super open and seemed like they would be really receptive - they just have busy schedules and were never actually there when we went for appointments.  But this Tuesday, we had an appointment, and they were there and they let us in, and after A YEAR of trying to teach them we taught them the restoration - and they were super receptive! They said they'd pray about it and read the pamphlet (we didn't have a lot of time and didn't teach the whole lesson). They already have Books of Mormon, and they've actually been to Nauvoo of all places (they have family that lives in Illinois and they went by one day, just curious). They went to the Gilbert temple open house twice and loved it and are very open to learning more.  It was just incredible to me, that over a year later, they finally became investigators! I almost cried when they let us inside the house and we sat down, I've had so much love for them since the first time I've met them and really have wanted to share this with them! We're trying to go by them tonight, their schedules really are a bit unpredictable, so pray that we'll get a hold of them!​  ​

We also had a great lesson with Gloria and her daughter, and it was so cute to watch Gloria teach her daughter about Joseph Smith and bear her testimony without even really knowing that was what she was doing. Ana was very engaged and interested, and we talked a lot about how she can pray and receive answers to her prayers.

  ​The choir is sounding good! We had a rehearsal going through all the numbers last Thursday and it

went well.  Sister Wheeler said she could really feel the spirit, so that's what's important!​

​We've been able to get in with some less actives who NEVER open the door and melt their hearts a little by offering to cook dinner for them! Service really does go a long way, which is why #LightTheWorld is such an inspired initiative.  As we serve people and show our love for them and the love that God has for them, it will warm their hearts and they'll remember it when the time is right.  They're our brothers and sisters, and we get so much joy out of serving them ourselves!  

Sister Neahusan (my new companion) just came into the gym and literally ran up to me screaming, "Are you so excited to be companions????" before tackling me in a hug. Pretty good start to the transfer haha​ 

Love,

Hermana Garner

Thanksgiving Dinners

We were able to talk to a lot of people about the Christmas concert this week. I love that Christmas is coming up! It's an easy way to get people to be more receptive, and the Christmas concert is an opportunity I'm super excited about. There's a special power in music, a special power in the Christmas season, and a special power in missionaries bearing testimony - and when you have all three at once, it's a powerhouse. It's truly exciting and humbling to be able to be a part of it.   

So ... Thanksgiving.  ​It was a really great day! In the morning, we had rehearsal for the Christmas concert, and it's sounding really good! I'm humbled that I got to be such a big part of it and as always with anything I put on, it's fun to see it start coming together. It's been a little stressful, adding that onto regular proselyting work, but also brought me a lot of joy and helped me be more in tune with the spirit.   The rest of the day was basically dinners. We weren't allowed to leave the house without having an appointment, and the only appointments you get on Thanksgiving are for dinners. 

    First, we had an early dinner with some of Hna Fuimaono's extended family - she had no idea they lived here, had never met them before, but found them while tracting with Sisters Hanson and Neahusan.  They were so welcoming and it was so fun to be at their house. We got to share a short message about gratitude, and I prayed in Samoan, which touched them. It wasn't very good haha but at least I tried! Sisters Cedeno and Weyand were also there, it was so fun to be able to see them so much this week while they were visiting! We still have leftover cornbread and sweet potatoes from them in our fridge, the sweet potatoes were reeeeealllly good.   

Then we went to the Aguirre's - that's the family that sent you the picture. They're an amazing family,

they're converts to the church of about five years and incredibly strong. The oldest son just got back from his mission in the Dominican Republic, and Brother Aguirre is the assistant ward mission leader. They took us to the Christmas lights with Gloria and her daughter on Friday, which was so fun!  
  Next, we went to the Hoffman's. It was just us, the elders, Brother and Sister Hoffman and their son. It was a tender, intimate dinner where we were able to really talk about the purpose of the season as we sat there. They're from Venezuela, and they made a traditional dish that they make for Christmas there called pan de jamon. It was AMAZING -  as soon as I ate it I was in love. They gave me four pieces to take home, and I enjoyed it even more for breakfast the next day when I wasn't so stuffed haha.  

Those three were pretty traditional Thanksgiving dinners, but then we went to the Lopez's house for our last one and I got to see how hispanics celebrate Thanksgiving! It was so much fun, there was music and dancing and a really, really good cocoa. Everyone was just hanging around and enjoying each others' company, it was the Lopez's whole family and then a bunch of their friends from the ward. They're such a great family,

Sisters Cedeño and Weyand came to surprise Gloria

   Compared to Thursday, Friday was very slow, but we had an awesome experience at the Mesa Temple Christmas Lights with Gloria and her daughter. she was obsessed with taking pictures of everything, which was cute to see, and you could tell that both of them felt the spirit as we walked around and looked at the nativities and talked a little about what it all meant.  Gloria is so happy to have her daughter here finally, it's sweet to see. Gloria is jumping right into teaching her everything, and she's already set aside a night every week for Family Home Evening and really wants to keep that spirit in her home always and help her daughter feel it.   Going through their presentation of nativities got a little emotional for me, to be honest. It was like a mini (VERY mini) version of the creche in Morristown, and it made me miss New Jersey. It also made me miss setting up my nativities with you, Mom, and wish I could be a part of that. But I wasn't exactly feeling homesick, just feeling love for all of you!

with Sister Weyand

  Saturday we got a surprise call from some of the sisters in our zone asking me to accompany one of them for a musical number for a baptism. She already had a song picked out, and it was one I'd never played, so I was really nervous I wouldn't be able to do it. It was definitely rough ... but in general, I can see how my sight-reading has improved a lot with being on the mission and being asked to play all the time. Still, I wished it was better. But the spirit was there! It was a sweet old man getting baptized, he just started coming to church on his own and the first conversation he had with the missionaries started with, "I like this church, how do I join?" Why can't that happen all the time??? lol​  

Love,
Hermana Garner

Lunch with mi mamá de misión!!

Working With Lots of Great People!

Monday night, we didn't have a lot of time, but we decided at 8:00 PM to try to go by a family. We showed up just as they were pulling into their driveway. We were able to get their phone numbers, then they said, "Do you want to come inside?" We all sat down around the table, and it turns out that one of them has been independently searching for a church and had decided to come to ours on Sunday.  We talked about our purpose as missionaries and how we can know that God is really there and taught her how to pray. We asked her if she would be baptized if she knew this was all true, and she said yes and committed to be baptized on December 9th! ... The only sad part of this story is that they didn't come to church like they said they would, so we're going to go by tonight and hopefully figure out what happened. 

 One person did come to church, whose going to an English ward closer to their house, but they went with Sister McKeen and are excited about it. We've started teaching the daughter and she has a lot of questions. It's so fun to watch her mom teach her, and be so excited to share the gospel with her daughter. She's already set a night for family night and wants us to come whenever we can. This Friday we're going to the Mesa Christmas lights with them, which I'm excited about!​  ​

Hermana Garner with one of her new friends! 

Another young woman we are teaching didn't get to go to church (she also goes to an English ward closer to her house) but her father said he would go WITH her next week, which we're excited about. She has great support in that ward. The Young Woman's president is amazing - she took her to Deseret Book and bought her her own set of scriptures with her name on them, and has been willing to drive to Phoenix to pick her up for church when she's with her mom over the weekends! I want to be that devoted to service when I return home. We sometimes have trouble getting in touch with her, but we're going to start having regular lessons before mutual, so that'll be great. She's already telling everyone she's going to be baptized.  She went to the New Member Fireside with us last night  and said she felt the Spirit a lot and felt direction from the Lord.  ​

As we were trying to contact some potentials and new investigators, we met a man (who I'd actually met before, but never had a full conversation with). We'd talked to his wife a couple weeks ago and she seemed super interested, but when we were talking to him he kept saying he already knew about the church and saying that we needed to study the bible more. It wasn't in an antagonistic way, he was just emphasizing how much he believes in the bible, but he was talking about how the bible says not to add to the gospel, and he thinks the reason his wife's interested in what we're saying is because she doesn't know the bible as well as he does and doesn't know that we're adding to it. Though I didn't say that, I was struck by the truthfulness of that scripture - that we must not add to the gospel of Jesus Christ. What people don't understand is that the Book of Mormon doesn't add to the gospel at all - it's the same gospel, just another witness of it. We didn't try to argue with him about it, though, but we did talk about the importance of relying on the Lord to help us understand the scriptures, and by the end he agreed to read a pamphlet and pray about it, which to me was a small miracle. 

The choir is sounding great for the Christmas concert, I'm so excited about it! We also had a review of all the small group numbers this Saturday, and I was super impressed by them - they sound so good!  They're all so talented! 

I've been really bad at sharing my scripture study the past couple of weeks, and I apologize for that! But here are some of the thoughts that have stood out to me the most recently. 

 In Isaiah 28:24-29, Isaiah talks about how the plowman doesn't treat every plant the same, but he knows that they each need something different to grow. He compares this to how the Lord will harvest the earth, and it made me think more about our individual journeys to conversion. Everyone has a different story, and what brought me to Christ and to know of the truthfulness of the gospel is very different than what has brought others that I know to that same knowledge. But the Lord knows exactly what we need to grow, so that He can harvest us up to Himself. 

 I shared D&C 64:33 a while ago which is the one that says, "Be ye not weary in well-doing..." and while reading in Isaiah 40:28-29, I was reminded of it. Isaiah says, "Hast thou not known? hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary?" Well, duh, right? But what's important to us is the next verse - "He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength." It's so comforting to know that we can and do receive strength from one who never wearies, who is always strong. Thus, the commandment of "Be ye not weary" can really be seen as an invitation - "Come to me, and I will strengthen you, that you may do my work." 

  ​Last fun little tidbit for this week - I've been learning how to pray and testify in Samoan! So I say most of my prayers in Samoan now, though it's very broken Samoan haha.

Ou te alofa mo otou uma lava! (I love you all!) 

 Hermana Garner

More Miracles!

It never ceases to amaze me the miracles I see on the mission. I don't know why I'm always surprised, but I constantly am by just how active the Lord is in His work. It's because we are His children, and He truly loves us and wants us to come back home. It's humbling to be able to feel a portion of that love and help Him in this important work. 

 Wednesday was zone conference, and every zone conference we have car inspections. So we got there a little early so we could refill the coolant and things (they always have supplies available) and when we went to open the coolant it started boiling over. So ... that's not good. After zone conference we ended up having to go all the way to the dealership to drop it off, and then we were stranded in Gilbert and had to find a ride back home.  

flat tires from running over goats head thorns

And as a result of all of that, we didn't have a car on Thursday for exchanges, so we were on our bikes all day. And as you can see from the pictures I sent  ... that didn't turn out so well haha. We ended up stranded halfway to an appointment and had to call the other sisters for a ride back to the house.   

But then, we were walking to WalMart to buy tubes for our tires and I heard someone call my name! Natalie Giddens (one of Herman Garner's young women's leaders forom when we lived in GA) came up to us! Turns out she lives in our area, and she actually ended up giving us a referral. We stopped by the next day and also made a dinner appointment, so we're eating dinner with them this next Thursday :) 

 We finally got the car back that night, and headed to an appointment. We had a great lesson, reading Mosiah 18 and talking about becoming converted and the choice to be baptized. We extended December 2nd as a baptismal date, and they both accepted!!  The spirit was so strong! They are both diligently seeking truth! 

  Friday night, we organized a night of going on splits with a bunch of ward members, and I went out with Sister Dickinson, the relief society secretary. She's from Ecuador and she's absolutely hilarious, and really sweet. That morning, Sister Fuimaono and I had planned what we each wanted to do while we were on splits, but as Sister Dickinson started driving none of it felt right. So, we said a prayer, and eventually ended up at the house of a family that's been on our potentials list for a while. When we got there, the 13-year-old daughter answered the door, and she was clearly happy to see us. Long story short, she had taken her mom's Book of Mormon and started reading it, even though it was in Spanish and she doesn't really know how to read Spanish. So she was thrilled when we gave her an English one. We taught her how to prayer, and in her prayer before we left she said, "And please help me because I really do want to know if the Book of Mormon is true." We have an appointment with them tonight and are excited to get back in! The older sister came out at the end and asked for her own Book of Mormon as well, and they both told us that the dad has been hoping we would stop back by soon.  

  We're definitely looking forward to this week and hoping that we'll be able to put more people on date and help them to find the joy of the gospel! 

Love,

Hermana Garner

Tender Mercies 6 & 7: Finding Happiness and Learning to Forgive

First day of 6th grade. New state, new school - new life.

It would be an understatement to say that I was nervous.

But I went in with high hopes. When I saw Rachel in the hall - the one person I new in my grade, since she was a member of my ward - I smiled and waved, but unfortunately she wasn't in my class.

That's okay, I thought. I'll just make new friends.

Sitting down, the shocking realization that everyone around me was speaking another language momentarily put me into a catatonic state. I knew we lived close to Mexico, but I hadn't really thought about how close and that I would suddenly be a minority in my community.

It was overwhelming.

But again, how exciting, to be able to have this new experience and learn about a culture that was different than what I'd always grown up with!

The day went by quickly, and before I knew it I was in line waiting for the bus. Two girls sat in front of me, chatting away in Spanish. One of them turned to face me, and I felt my heart jump a little with the anxiety any new kid feels.

"Do you speak Spanish?" she asked brightly.

"No," I said with a bit of a sheepish laugh. "I just moved -"

"Oh, good!" she said, sounding relieved, then turned and continued to animatedly talk to her friend.

***

A few months passed, and I felt like I'd begun to find my place in this new world. I was learning a few Spanish words, but still couldn't join in many of the conversations my peers were having. But that was all right, they all spoke English too!

I'd joined a few school clubs - band, music appreciation, theatre - and was enjoying developing my talents. I'd also made an amazing friend - we'll call her Sandra - and spent most nights at her house playing with her dad's old typewriter and recording equipment.

She was in my classes, and we were almost inseparable. Every activity we did, we did it together. She even came to some church parties with me and enjoyed them!

Things were much better than they had been at the beginning of the year, and I was starting to feel like I fit in.

***

I don't remember when it was - sometime about halfway through the school year - but I arrived at school, and no one would talk to me. Not even Sandra. I told myself I was imagining things, but when we went outside to recess, and I went to the usual spot to hang out with my friends - no one joined me. In fact, they moved to the opposite end of the field, and kept moving further away from me when I tried to join them.

What is going on?

I ended up giving up on trying to join them, and went to sit on one of the swings. The playground almost immediately emptied of all the students in my grade. I watched them scatter from my presence like wild animals that sense danger.

Finally, after about 10 minutes, Victoria started heading towards me. She seemed somewhat hesitant as she sat on the swing next to mine, but managed a smile.

"How are you?" she asked.

"Confused," I said, frowning as Sandra and I made eye contact for just a moment before she immediately turned away. "Why is everyone avoiding me?"

Victoria hesitated, but then sighed. "Because of what Sandra said."

My eyebrows shot up in shock. "What - What did she say?"

The rest of recess, Victoria told me how Sandra had spread all my secrets throughout the school (as horrible as a 6th graders secrets can be) and dozens of lies as well, saying I said things I never did, that I stole from her, that I was a liar - and many more horrible things I never thought people actually said about each other.

That night, I went home and cried for hours. I cried every night for at least a month.

***

Victoria was practically the only person who talked to me at school. I was grateful for her friendship, but that didn't make everything else that much easier. Still, she was someone to lean on.

But I was not happy. I wanted to go back to Utah desperately, where I knew I had friends and I wasn't ostracized by my class. Or at least, I wanted the school year to end so I could move on to middle school and hopefully make friends with people who didn't think I was a thief and a liar.

It was in the middle of all of this that I turned 12 and joined Young Womens. I was immediately introduced to the Personal Progress Program.

Well, I had no friends to really spend time with, so what else was I going to do with my time?

I jumped head first into completing my projects to get my medallion. And suddenly, I found that I was happy again. People still didn't really talk to me, and they still made fun of me, but as I developed my faith, divine nature, individual worth, and other values, I didn't feel alone. I started to recognize who I was, that I was a daughter of God, that my family was still there for me, and that they always would be.

And that, above all, Heavenly Father had a plan for me, and that plan included being happy.

The next year was full of rich, rewarding experiences that brought me closer to my Father in Heaven and healed broken bonds with my friends and acquaintances at school. I did move on to middle school, and I met some amazing people. And before I turned 13, I'd earned my Personal Progress medallion.

***

As 7th grade ended, so did my time in South Texas. The last day of classes, I boarded a plane with my family to our next stop on our journey - New Jersey. I didn't know what to expect, but I was looking forward to a fresh start - and I knew that, no matter what happened, Heavenly Father would make it all work out, because that's what He did for me in Texas.

But as we got settled in our new house, there was a weight on my shoulders dragging me down - the bitterness I felt towards Sandra for what she'd done. There were so many things that would have been different if it hadn't been for her! I wouldn't have struggled so much, I would have had more friends, gone to more activities ...

One day, as I was again reflecting on this, a scripture came to my mind: "I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men." (D&C 64:10)

Letting out a deep breath, I asked for strength from the Lord to forgive Sandra, a girl who I at one point had called my best friend. And when I'd worked up enough courage, I picked up the phone and dialed her number.

"Hola?"

"Hi ... is Sandra there?"

"Yes she is, just a minute ..."

I let out another breath until I heard her voice on the other line.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Sandra," I said softly. "It's Tiffany."

There was a long, uncomfortable silence. "Hi ..."

"So, I - I just wanted to call to say sorry," I muttered out.

There were plenty of things I'd said over my time in Texas in my anger that I shouldn't have, and the spirit was helping me recognize that and feel sorrow for not being more Christlike, whatever another person's actions had been.

"Sorry?"

"Yeah, for being rude to you," I said. "And ... I wanted to let you know that I forgive you, too, and I really, really hope you have a good school year."

Another awkward silence followed. "... Okay."

After a few more awkward exchanges, we both hung up. And the burden I'd felt on my shoulders was gone.

I couldn't stop smiling, feeling so much gratitude to my Father in Heaven, and truly wishing the best for Sandra.

A little bit later, I called Victoria, my one really close friend from Texas. A couple minutes into the conversation, she said, "I thought you would miss me more, but you sound so happy!"

I just laughed, smiling widely. "I do miss you, but ... I am happy. Really happy."

Jesus, Others and You

Not that much to report on for this week. It was a bit slow - we weren't able to get in with a lot of people, and both Sister Fuimaono and I have been sick - but we persevered and did see miracles from it!   

Yesterday we had a regional conference where Elder Cornish, Sister Marriott, and Elder Christofferson spoke, so it was STACKED. It was all about service and how service is what brings us joy - the other 70 that spoke said that 'Joy' can be broken down as am acronym: Jesus, Others, and You. When we focus on things in that order, that's when we find joy. It made me rewrite 2 Nephi 2:25 In my head: "Adam fell that men might be, and men are that they might serve."  

 The ironic thing about all of that is that, while serving this week, I got a concussion. It was really stupid. I was under an overpass picking up trash and didn't think about the fact that there was a road right above me, so ... I banged my head. So Saturday was spent in Urgent Care getting checked out. It's a very minor concussion, nothing to really worry about, but it's definitely made it a bit hard to focus and typing this email isn't very pleasant. But I'm grateful I can still work!  

Highlights of the week, though - Tuesday, we got to go to the temple while everyone else in the world

We got to go with Gloria to the temple to do baptism for the dead

was trick or treating, and it was such a special experience. It was definitely one of the times that I've learned the most while in the temple, and I got to talk to Sister Wheeler in the celestial room about some of the symbolism and came to understand and appreciate it better.

Friday, we had an incredible lesson with a new investigator. She's very strong in her own beliefs, and you can tell that she has an earnest desire to follow God. As we were speaking, she acknowledged that she'd never heard any of this before and expressed her concerns, we testified of how she could know for herself and she immediately agreed to read and pray. Despite her doubts, she wants to know the truth and is very open to not knowing everything and gaining a better understanding. She's so humble! She also just has the cutest

I saw one of my STLs from the MTC at the temple

family ever and a genuine light of happiness and gratitude to our Savior.

 Thursday was awesome with choir practice - we were really focusing on the words of the songs, and I expressed to the missionaries that I wanted to feel their testimonies as they sang. We were about to sing Joy to the World, and we just talked about the wonder and majesty of the Lord's birth and what it means for all of us. When they started singing, I was hit with a wall of the spirit - dozens of missionaries bearing their testimony with the power of the spirit behind it at once. It brought me close to tears, and I actually had to take a step back and just breathe when they finished singing the song. I feel so privileged to be able to work on this concert and have such a testimony of the power of music!

Love,
Hermana Garner

Tender Mercy 5: Pushing Through

I had planned on focusing on past experiences and writing them in story form so it was a bit more engaging, but today is different. Because today, I have a concussion - MINOR concussion, mind you, but it still hurts. It's been hard to focus and my head has been pounding all day.

This morning, after a meeting we had with the bishop, I asked the elders to give me a blessing. In that blessing I was promised strength to be able to overcome what I was facing as I put forth my best effort.

So after dinner, when I felt like I was going to throw up what I'd just eaten and couldn't even imagine trying to teach the gospel, let alone in Spanish, I resisted the urge to tell my companion I needed to go lay down. I thought to myself, "You can do it, at least for a little while."

After each person we visited, I found myself tempted yet again to say, "Sister Fuimaono, my head is killing me." And she, being the observant person that she is, wasn't ignorant of how I was feeling (and on another note, didn't feel great herself today). She kept asking me if I was sure I was okay, and I thought back on the blessing and said yes.

I can knock one more door.

Almost 3 hours later, we headed home to do our studies. And after that last door - spending all the time we could proselyting - my headache subsided considerably. Yes, it still hurts, but much less than before.

I know that's a direct blessing from the diligence I showed today to the Lord. I wish I could say that every day I'm that diligent - the sad truth is, I'm not. But we don't ever have to wonder if our effort is worth it, no matter how painful the process - there's always something better waiting for us on the other end of the trial.

Tender Mercy 4: An Unwanted Answer

Texas.

I barely remembered anything about it, it had been so long since we lived there. I remembered visiting relatives a few times, and I knew that it was really far away from all my friends in Utah.

And now, my parents were telling us we might move there.

I didn't want to move. I didn't want to leave my school or my ward, or the community theatre I'd gotten involved in. Life was great where we were! Why would we move?

"It's a better job for your dad,"  was the answer, but it wasn't one I was really satisfied with. I didn't see why he needed to change his job if we were perfectly happy where we were.

Saturday night, Mom and Dad gathered us into the living room. "We're going to fast together tomorrow and ask Heavenly Father if this is what we're supposed to do," they said.

Okay, I thought, If it's what He wants, I'll do it.

But even as I thought those words, I was sure it couldn't possibly be what He wanted.

The next day, we said a prayer as a family to start our fast in the morning. Being ten years old, it was my first time really fasting, but this was a serious matter, so I took it seriously. Even when my younger siblings snacked, I didn't, because I wanted to make sure my parents got the right answer - which, of course, was that we were supposed to stay in Utah.

Finally, the time came to break our fast. We knelt down, and my father offered the prayer. As he said "Amen," I immediately felt my eyes well up with tears.

Heavenly Father wanted us to move.

In that moment, I knew that as surely as I knew my own name.

And I was not happy about it.

But I'd told myself that, if it was what Heavenly Father wanted, I would do it. So I didn't fight it anymore, and instead tried to prepare myself for the change.

15 years later, looking back on that moment, I can see how it changed my life forever. I wouldn't be the person I am today if we'd stayed in Utah, and I don't think my family would be as close as we are. It was hard, but as was said in General Conference, hard is good.

I am grateful that Heavenly Father gave me an answer I didn't want, so that He could give me something better than I had imagined.

Lots of new things this week

So, surprise surprise, I actually didn't move haha, the assistants were confused about where my area was and tried to move us 20 minutes further from it ... we already live outside of our area and struggle with our allotted miles. So I said no haha.   We have two English companionships living with us now, both of them with brand new greenies.  It's been fun so far, but it's weird not having other Spanish sisters in the house! And like I said last week, I'm in the same area.  The sisters living with us are actually in a different zone, so it's weird that we don't have any of our meetings with them. The environment in the house is good - the greenies are really excited to be there so it's a positive atmosphere with excitement. 

I'm sure you want to hear more about Sister Fuimaono! . She's really an amazing woman. She was born in Samoa but has lived in Utah since she was about 9. She's hilarious and also really sweet. She's also really humble and always striving to learn more. And every time I leave the room, I come back to about 15 selfies of her on my phone. She's obsessed with taking pictures haha.     It was a crazy week, but a great one! You've already seen parts of it on Facebook with the story of Joyce - it truly was a miracle, and we've seen so many people being generous and giving us food. It's good because we thought that we would get our cards refilled last week, but it turns out that they won't be refilled until this coming weekend, so we won't be able to buy the things we were planning on. But we have more than enough and don't have anything to worry about. The Lord truly provides for His missionaries, and it's humbling to be on the receiving end of it! 

 In our last two days together, Sister Showalter and I found THREE new investigators, which was exciting! We have a lot of potential in the area to follow up with as well. There's almost too much to do, sometimes I feel very overwhelmed looking at the list of names on my phone and knowing that each is a precious child of God. I want so badly to help them feel His love.   

 We had an investigator that I found my very first week in the mission, last July. Well, she'd moved, but the sisters in Gilbert happened to knock on her door, and she still had the Book of Mormon that Sister Cedeno and I gave her with our testimonies written in it! She kept talking about us as her friends. It was tender to know that she remembered me! 

    Wednesday was the ward's trunk or treat, which was a lot of fun! There were a LOT of people

there, too, including a lot of investigators and less actives, which was great to see! We tried to facilitate fellowshipping without forcing it, and we think everyone had a good time. Be on the look out for new people when you're at activities, ask the missionaries who their investigators are and reach out, and it makes SUCH a difference!!  

 We had two great lessons with an investigator this week. She's truly growing in her faith, and she keeps all of the commitments we give her. She wants to know if it's true. She's also had some really, really awesome experiences in this week with receiving answers to prayers - she had a question, more of a curiosity really, and prayed about it. Immediately afterwards she ended up reading the Plan of Salvation pamphlet we gave her, and on the FIRST PAGE the question was answered. She said she was super surprised! But she also understands that her questions won't always be answered immediately, and she's willing to be patient. I love her!!!  

Biggest news of the week - KARLA GOT BAPTIZED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't know if you remember me writing about her, Sister Hanson and I were teaching her a lot when I first moved down to Queen Creek, and she really wanted to make changes to join the church and come closer to Christ, but was so stressed with life and had a lot of challenges and obstacles in her way. Well, they continued working with her, and they started going to an English ward and she and her two kids who are old enough all got baptized on Saturday!!! It was so humbling to know that I was the smallest part of that, and there were SO many missionaries there because we've all worked with them. Karla was so happy,  I got to perform a musical number as part of the program, which was a privilege for sure.

We're not allowed to be proselyting or on the streets Halloween night so they're putting all the missionaries in the temple.  I'm excited!

 I was really impressed by Alma 45:1 - it talks about how the Nephites gave thanks to the Lord through fasting, which I had never, ever thought about before. Fasting I always thought about as something you do when you want or need something, not to show thanks. I've been reflecting a lot on it and changing the way I think about that act.

Love,

Hermana Garner

We also received some nice words for her new companion Sister Fuimaono

 I am doing great, this week has been awesome. Hermana Garner and I hit it off just great and I love her.  She has talents! I told Hermana Garner that I'm going to do all that I can to make her few last transfers the best! She is an amazing missionary that HAS power, She has been the biggest blessing already! I hope you know how FIRE  her Spanish is. She is awesome. 

Tender Mercy 3: Saying Goodbye

I LOVED Activity Days! Aside from being baptized, it was probably the best thing about turning eight. And I LOVED my Activity Days leader (who we'll call Sister Jones). Sister Jones always had the funnest activities planned, and one time we even got to make our own dolls!

Plus, she made really, really good brownies.

Sunday morning, I walked into church just like any other week, immediately making my way to my family's bench (because, yes, we did have our own designated seats, of course). I hugged Sister Jones on the way there and happily sat down next to my mother.

The meeting started - we sang a song I didn't know, someone said a pray I didn't really pay attention to, and then the bishop stood up to give announcements. Suddenly, I heard Sister Jones' name, and looked up to see her standing.

"Sister Jones has been released as Activity Days coordinator."

My jaw fell open. How could they do that?? It was an outrage! I folded my arms across my chest and pouted in a huff.

"I cannot sustain!" I announced to my mom as every raised their hands to the square.

She looked down at me with raised eyebrows, and in a whisper explained that by not raising my hand, I wasn't thanking Sister Jones for everything she'd done. My scowl turned into a frown of regret as I saw that lovely woman sit down, and I looked down at my lap, feeling very sad.

I didn't pay attention to who they called as the new Activity Days Coordinator - I was still incredibly upset. When we got home, I went to sit next to my mother on the couch.

"Mom," I whined, "why would they release Sister Jones? She's awesome!"

"Maybe Sister Johnson will be awesome, too," my mom assured me.

"But why?" I demanded. "It doesn't make any sense! She should keep doing it!"

"Maybe the Lord has something else He needs her to do," my mother explained. "We don't always know why people get called or released, but it's not our decision - it's the Lord's, and we just have to support them as they try to do what He wants."

I was very quiet after that. I hadn't really thought about how callings were decided before, but in that moment it started to sink in that there was more to it than someone being 'awesome' or the bishop deciding something needed to change.

So the next week, I went to Activity Days with a smile.

And yes, Sister Johnson was awesome too. And of course she was - Heavenly Father chose her, after all.

Tender Mercy 2: The Abandoned Dollhouse

A pile of empty cardboard boxes was slowly forming in the living room as the morning drew on. When I was sure that I had enough for my project, I set off to gather glue, scissors, and markers as well.

Why? Because it was time for General Conference again! And that meant that we didn't have to go to church, so I had plenty of time to make the perfect dollhouse I'd been dreaming of while Mom and Dad listened to all those old guys talk on the TV.

When the music started, I hummed along while I set up my supplies, and was soon hyper-focused on my task. This wasn't going to be just any dollhouse. It was going to have at least 6 rooms, and all of them fully furnished! Soon enough, the bedroom on the top left started to take shape, and I excitedly started moving on to the next one -

"All right, kids, it's time to listen to the prophet," my dad announced.

My tongue sticking out of my mouth in concentration, I ignored him, trying to glue down the bed I'd just made in the perfect spot ...

"Tiff-girl," my father's voice sounded again. "Come sit on the couch, the prophet's talking."

I groaned quietly and pouted, but put down my precious project and went to sit next to my mom. I recognized the old man on the screen as President Hinckley, but it was always so hard to understand him. And yet, for some reason my parents always made us stop playing when he talked at General Conference.

As I leaned into my mother and she ran her fingers through my hair, I found myself starting to pay more attention than I had in the past. Maybe I was finally learning how to understand his voice, I'd heard it so much. But even though I didn't entirely understand everything he was saying, all of the sudden I felt a warm feeling come over me, like I was being covered by a blanket.

"He really is the prophet, huh?" I whispered.

"Mhmm," my mom responded quietly.

I sat up a little straighter, setting aside thoughts of what I would do next on my dollhouse, and for the first time really tried to listen to what the prophet was saying. And when he finished speaking, I didn't move, but stayed next to my mother as the next speaker took the pulpit.

Tender Mercy 1: Finding Anastasia

The frantic sound of small, running footsteps down the stairs interrupted the rare quiet of the house. My curls bouncing with every anxious step, I rushed from room to room, my six-year-old face contorted with distress.

"Mommy! MOMMY!"

"What's wrong?" she said, emerging from the study. Her tone was ever patient, and filled with motherly concern for the woes of her child.

Tears began to stream down my face. "I can't find it!"

"You can't find what, Tiffany?"

"My blue dress Anastasia!"

With those words, she knew this was truly an emergency. I had begged and begged for the blue dress Anastasia Barbie doll for Christmas, but Santa was only able to get me the yellow dress Anastasia. A little after Christmas, though, I got the best surprise of my life when another present showed up from Santa with the Barbie I'd wanted all along.

And now, she was missing.

My dear mother knelt on the ground next to her crying child. "All right, when was the last time you saw her?"

"I don't know!" I wailed, about ready to give up. "I've looked everywhere!"

"Have you said a prayer?"

My crying stopped as I looked at her, her question sinking in a little. "No ..."

"Well, I don't know where she is, but Heavenly Father does," she said, brushing my hair back and giving me and encouraging smile. "Let's say a prayer."

I nodded and knelt down next to my mother, mumbling out a simple prayer asking Heavenly Father to help me find this doll that was so precious to me. When I opened my eyes, I looked over at our blanket basket, and suddenly remembered. Rushing over, I threw all the blankets out, and there between them was my blue dress Anastasia.

Quickly, I snatched her up and held her tightly to my chest, relief filling my small frame. "Thank you, Heavenly Father!" I squealed, then rushed back upstairs, smiling from ear to ear.

Cultural Fair

So, I'm not getting transferred, but I'm moving houses, so I'll let you know my new address next week!

Sister Showalter's getting transferred. 

It was a good week, though a little bit slow as far as the work goes. Not a lot of people answered the door and we dropped a lot of potentials. 

    Choir practice was good, but I'm realizing just how much I need to practice leading the songs. It's definitely not a skill I've really learned! But it's a good challenge and I'm having fun with it.  

We had a lot of fun dancing on Friday, even though we didn't do the best job ... but hey, we got to be part of a traditional Mexican dance! The "Fiesta de la Hispanidad" basically turned into "Fiesta de la Hispanidad AND Samoa!" Sister Fuimaono has extended family in the area, and they're teaching them (because not all of them are members). She invited them to come to the cultural night (it's to celebrate all the cultures found in the ward and anyone in the area who wants to participate, they're just mostly hispanic lol) and MAN they put on a show! I'll send a couple videos, it was fantastic! The food was really good, too, We had to leave right at 9, which was sad because it kept going for much longer after that. I want to come back next year and just party all night long with the members :P 

 There are also a lot of community events that happen here, and we volunteer at a lot of them but can never participate really. One of them was this weekend, it was a HUGE Halloween activity that took up most of the nearby shopping center. We just helped set up for it. It looked like it would be so much fun! 

 We met a potential last week who we had an appointment with, but when we stopped by she wasn't there. No one answered the door for the longest time, and we were a bit disappointed, but then her husband FINALLY answered. He apologized for her, and then said, "She said to tell you she's sorry, and to give you this." In his hand he had a small nativity ornament from Mexico. The first time we met her, we bonded over our nativity collections, and she said she was going to give me one of hers. I didn't expect her to in the slightest, but even though she couldn't make the appointment she remembered and had him give it to me! It was so tender, I almost cried! I will treasure it forever. We're hoping we'll be able to see her tonight.

  Other than that, things have been pretty slow here. We're weeding out our potentials list, but not really finding any more. Pray that we'll be led to those the Lord is preparing over this next transfer.  

And I just have one scripture this week that I wrote down to share - Psalms 103:22-21 ...  11 For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy toward them that fear him.  12 As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.

Love,  Hermana Garner

Music Practice, Heavenly Homes, and Dancing With Piñas

Choir practice started this week for the Christmas concert!​ It's been exciting, and nerve-wracking at the same time. I didn't have a pianist, because neither of the ones in my area could make it, so I had to play out parts and direct with my other hand. Which was ... interesting. I'm looking forward to directing more and not having to focus on so many things at once haha.  But it went well overall! We also had a meeting with the narrators for the program to brainstorm a bit, and I used some techniques that I've learned throughout my schooling and teaching to generate ideas. As I was getting everything started, one of the other sisters said, "You should be a drama teacher." I laughed, thinking it was a joke. It turned out she had no idea that I am, in fact, a drama teacher. I guess it was just meant to be :)

  We had an incredibly humbling experience with a member that we met. She goes to an English ward, but she's from Ecuador and Spanish is her first language. Immediately, she welcomed us into her home and served us an impromptu dinner (which was a miracle, because we didn't have dinner that night, and it was GOOD). She lived in a small apartment with her two daughters, and there was furniture packed up the walls. Turns out they had just moved from a big house to that little apartment as a waypoint as they look for a new home. But the moment we stepped into that cramped little apartment, the spirit was overwhelming. That woman truly is celestial. As we visited with her, we learned of all that she's given up for the church - family, friends, even a house - and she is actively sharing the gospel with everyone she meets. Being in her home, I was reminded of Elder Bednar's talk, and I truly felt the same spirit that I feel in the temple. At one point, she said, "Satan has no power here," and it was true. Because of her faithfulness and her choice to be cheerful despite her circumstances, there was no way for the devil to enter that home. I strive to some day have half the faith that she has.  

with Ana Maria

And speaking of celestial homes, we got to go to the Mesa temple!! Normally in this mission we never get to go inside the Mesa temple, but Gilbert was closed for cleaning and our recent convert, Ana Maria, was getting her endowment, so we got special permission. It's beautiful inside, I have a newfound appreciation for it! And it was just wonderful to be in the temple again. We also saw Sister Weyand, who came back for it, which was so fun!  ​

reunited with Sister Weyand

In other news, we're going to be dancing this weekend. Somehow the members convinced us to take part in a traditional Mexican dance from Oaxaca, la baile de la pina, which celebrates the harvest of pineapples. So ... we're dancing with pineapples. It's going to be interesting for sure!​  

​ I was humbled and shocked by a visit that we made to a member. ​ I felt like we needed to show her a video about using technology to spread the gospel. As she was watching it, she started crying, and proceeded to tell us about her grandmother's funeral. In the middle of sharing some thoughts about her grandmother, she wanted to play "I Know That My Redeemer Lives" for those in attendance (the majority not members) and rather than going to LDS.org to find something, she went to facebook - and played the video that I recorded a couple weeks ago, holding her phone up to the microphone. She said that there were many people there who were touched by it, including her brother, who said he felt the spirit stronger than he has in a long time.  As I listened, I couldn't believe that the Lord had used the small prompting I received to record that video to reach people who I've never met all the way in Texas through this one member who saw it. Nothing is a coincidence, as Elder Rasband taught us in conference, and I felt the spirit confirm to me that I was an instrument in His hands in ways that I don't even know. I likely never would have known about her decision to share that video with her family and acquaintances. And it wasn't something that I needed to know - but it was something that strengthened me this week and showed me that yes, my efforts are making a difference, and in ways that I can't even see. 

Love,

Hermana Garner